Kimberly A. Whaley

“The Living End, A memoir of Forgetting and Forgiving” by Robert Leleux is published by St. Martin’s Press In New York.

Robert Leleux relates what is lost and found in his grandmother’s life with Alzheimer’s. For families who are living with the suffering of Alzheimer’s, this lovely human story will share both understanding and inspiration.

Sharing from the beach in the Caribbean, I found this book so enjoyable and insightful in relating to the many situations I find my clients enduring with their loved one’s.

Leleux writes of his experience with JoAnn his gran and ” going along” with the evolving reality of a person with Alzheimer’s- a form of behavioural therapy called ” habilitation.” JoAnn’s husband calling it ” painting the roses read.” Habilitation as distinguished against “reality orientation” where it was once thought that you should correct the thinking of the person and re-orient with reality.

Leleux writes of his struggles to make peace with the way society treats the elderly…..the disregard, disrespect, patronising, condescending ways of robbing a person of humanity.

Leleux: ” I’ve always been a person to whom “forgive and forget” has seemed absurdly unworkable. Though I’m not so arrogant as to presume to edit scripture, since witnessing my grandmother’s alzheimer’s, I’ve begun to wonder whether a small reversal wouldn’t better suit humanity. Maybe it would be more practical if forgetting preceded forgiving. Maybe happiness would be more easily achieved if we all made a practice of forgetting. ”

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